There is an elaborate joke tucked behind his eyes, when he sees beautiful things he laughs. You thought he was being cruel, he was actually falling in love. He didn't realize all the guts he had busted laughing would change the way he sees beautiful things. When he no longer saw your love his eyes no longer hid an elaborate joke but an immense sense that all he knew, once upon a time, of jokes and beautiful things would remain a grainy crust in the corner of his eyes. Blurring. Everything. Beautiful. You.
Monday, August 17, 2015
i used the space between my heart and ribs, the entry way into properly ending a life, to store all my mixed emotions; bumping into old flames, craving that person who was in a relationship, crossing the street when it wasn't my turn.. sometimes i would carry the whole lot in that spot, just west of my gut and hope someone would bump into me so that it would slosh about, perhaps fall into my leg and down to my foot so i could go for a run and slam it out on the concrete. that very rarely happened. there is currently a gully of mixed emotions somewhere south west of my heart and i can only hope the beating of the muscle will pound it to a pulpy substance and dissolve it into a case of slow churning heart burn. it wouldn't be the worst thing. the mixed emotions buoy on a tether connected somewhere in the depths of my mind and flap about like a sad inflatable creature with giant wavy arms and a placid smile.